I Look High, But It’s Just My Vagus Nerve Doing Its Thing
Confessions of a Germaphobe
🎶 These are my confessions 🎶 (in my Usher voice)
I don’t sit on my bed with “outside” clothes. My kids know the drill—if you haven’t showered, there’s a chair by my bed just for you.
I wear shower shoes in hotels. My daughter thought everyone did… until she started traveling with her team. 🤣
I wash my hands a lot while cooking. Touch my phone? Wash. Leave the room? Wash again. You get the picture.
So the other day, I was thawing meat on the counter when some blood leaked from the container. As I was cleaning it up, my wonderful husband, John, offered to help. Perfect! I could keep cooking.
A few minutes later, he proudly announced:
“I used the towel from the floor, but it’s clean!” 🫠
In my world, “clean floor” is an oxymoron. My face said it all.
Seeing my face, he tried to explain, “I just steamed the floor and used the towel to dry it.” Yeah, still not helping. My face was frozen in pure disgust while he looked genuinely confused. Cue heavy sigh.
The old me would’ve lost it—raised my voice, rattled off stats about floors being forever filthy, maybe even Googled proof.
And for the record, I don’t want to hear how kitchen counters are dirtier than toilet seats. That will NOT soothe my germaphobic brain. Don’t confuse me with science.
But lately, I’ve been leaning into body regulation techniques more than ever. I’ve always used cold showers, yoga, deep breathing, and meditation to stay calm, but adding vagus nerve exercises has been a game-changer.
So when the floor towel moment hit, I felt a literal hot surge all over my body… but then—poof—it was gone. No shouting, no spiraling. Just responding with a calm, “This gives me anxiety just thinking about it.”
John, being the “gem” that he is, grabbed disinfectant, let it sit, and wiped the counter down.
Calm restored. ✨ But, for the record, I still haven’t used that part of the counter.
Before I discovered my Calm Mom techniques, my stress response was a solid 1,000,000.
Picture me jumping on a moving car (I was pregnant and didn’t know it), throwing a pan of raw chicken at the wall in college, and accidentally getting Tony Chachere’s in my friend’s eye (Sorry, Jenee!).
Oh, and let’s not forget the time a cop called for backup on me.
I could write a book on my epic meltdowns—just ask anyone who’s known me for over 20 years.
Once I started coaching and using calming strategies, I got that number down to 10,000—major progress.
Now, with vagus nerve exercises in my toolkit, I’m cruising at a solid 50-100 most days.
That is, unless my husband spends six minutes looking for minced garlic in the produce section while calling me three times for directions. He literally called while I was typing this blog, he keeps giving me content. 😩
Cue vagus nerve ear massage while talking to him.
I never realized just how much these exercises would change my life.
I’m sharing one of the exact exercises I used while my husband was on his garlic hunt — check it out!
Disclaimer: I’m not a medical professional, so if you’re curious about vagus nerve exercises, check with your doctor first.
And no, I’m not “high” in this video—it’s just the magic of constant nervous system regulation at work.
P.S. – I’m 51 and take testosterone—complete game changer. The benefits are incredible! The beard and lovely dark spots? Yeah… we’re just gonna pretend those don’t exist in the video. 😆
