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MOMS OF Autistic Kids

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The Calm Mom Coach

Providing moms with strategies that create more ease.

Hanging on by a thread?

At one point in my life, I was hanging on by a thread.

We had lost our business, our house, vehicles, and our marriage was in ruins.

I had for so long operated under extreme stress and overwhelm. I was burnout.

I didn’t want to get out of bed. I told my therapist repeatedly; I don’t want to die. I just want to go into a coma and wake up when this is all over.

I had no desire to be around people. I would shower, take my anti-depressants, and get back in bed.

My life felt empty and dead.

Even though I loved my kids, I would often wish I could leave and go far away.

I got a therapist, read hundreds of books and got a coach. I also implemented many of the things below, it saved my marriage and my life.

These things work and can keep you from going into the dark space I experienced. If you’re already in that dark space get some help immediately.

Typically, at one point or another, women go through varying degrees of burnout.

According to the American Psychological Association burnout increases people’s likelihood of developing myocardial infarction, ischemic heart disease, stroke and sudden cardiac death. Studies also point to an increased likelihood of type II diabetes, infertility, sleep disorders and musculoskeletal disorders among those with the extreme physical, mental and emotional fatigue.

Burnout is serious and over time can be detrimental to your life.

Seven Signs of Burnout

#1 Forgetfulness

Not your mill-of-the-road forgetfulness but excessive forgetfulness that’s not typical for you. You tend to forget important deadlines and events.

This is a sign of prolonged stress.

#2 Unproductive Days

You find yourself frequently not accomplishing tasks and/or goals but still feel exhausted. You spend the entire day feeling as if you’re running 100 miles per minute but nothing gets accomplished.

#3 Easily Triggered

Little things that wouldn’t normally bother you send you over the edge. You’re more emotional than usual – irrational anger, increased crying episodes, hopelessness, pessimistic, etc. Also, you tend to be less sympathetic to others.

#4 Insomnia

You have a hard time falling or staying asleep. Many times your mind is constantly thinking, keeping you from falling asleep or going back to sleep.

#5 Lack of Energy & Enthusiasm

You find it hard to get out of bed even if you’ve had enough sleep. The daily demands in your life always exceed your energy resources. You find yourself barely doing the minimum with a general inability to perform. You feel drained and unable to cope.

#6 Frequent Illness

  • Headaches
  • Stomach issues
  • Frequent sickness that may be the result of a low immune system (flu, cold, etc.)
  • Muscle tension and pain

#7 Alienation

You frequently desire to be all alone. You may even wish you could go away where no one knows you.

Strategies to Help & Prevent Burnout

If you’re really struggling, get some help. Getting help isn’t a sign of weakness.

  1. Do an audit of your time. For the next 2-3 days note all of your activities. Nothing is too small. If you complete it during your day, add it to the list.
  2. Take the list and determine what is unnecessary (delete it) and what can be delegated.
  3. Figure out the main triggers on the list. Then decide how you should handle it.
  4. Learn to say NO! If you struggle with this, create a “polite” no phrase you can tell others.
  5. Create and enforce boundaries for everyone in your life.
  6. Get more rest & sleep.
  7. Exercise, yoga, and/or meditation.
  8. Take a vacation (adult only, if you have kids).
  9. Make self-care a priority.
  10. Give yourself grace and decrease negative self-talk.
  11. Release the desire for everything to be perfect.

In life there will be stressors and things that aren’t necessarily positive but these tools can help you get through it.

I made it through the worst times of my life and so can you. You can come out better, stronger, and more resilient.

If you would like to work with me. Set up a complimentary call here I can help guide your through this process.

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