MOM Blog



MOMS OF Autistic Kids

about ME


The Calm Mom Coach

Providing moms with strategies that create more ease.

What’s your problem behind the problem?

I posted this video to IG last week. Many clients come to me with a consistency issue but that’s not their issue. There is a problem behind the problem. They are consistent in going to work, picking up the kids, eating, etc. So consistency isn’t the problem.

Do you know the real problem behind the problem in your life? If you did, you could probably easily solve for it. ​

Trying to solve for the wrong problem is like replacing the pipes because no water is coming through. ​ However, the issue is the water is turned off. ​ No matter how many times we look at the pipes or replace the pipes we will never fix the issue. ​

Maybe you think your problem is communication. It may be you have a hard time releasing the past or you want to prove you’re right. SIDENOTE: You may be 100% right, but proving it solves zero purpose. It only destroys communication and connection.

Maybe you think your problem is that the kids are out of control. It may be you have unrealistic expectations of how kids “should” behave. I don’t care if your neighbor created little angels, that’s not what you have. SIDENOTE: We all want a certain level of respect as parents but we can’t control ANYONE, including our kids. You can however, have consequences for their actions, but that is the limit. You will drive yourself crazy attempting to control them.

If you’re struggling to solve a problem, it’s more likely you’re solving for the wrong thing. Figure out the real problem, then you will finally see change.

Want help solving the problem behind the problem? Schedule a consult today.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *